How to Stop Ruminating and Overcome Social Anxiety
HealthyGamerGG
9 min, 39 sec
The video discusses how to understand and address anxiety thought loops by identifying their root causes instead of engaging with the thoughts themselves.
Summary
- Anxiety can create a lose-lose situation by producing thoughts that lead to conflicting behaviors, making problem-solving ineffective.
- The root of anxiety-based thoughts often lies in an internal belief of not being liked or valued by others.
- Instead of focusing on the content of anxious thoughts, it's more effective to address the underlying emotional drivers of anxiety.
- Working with a therapist or coach can help identify and process the emotional causes of social anxiety.
- Anticipating anxiety in social situations and acknowledging it without resistance can reduce its power and stop the thought loops.
Chapter 1
![The video opens by illustrating the 'game' of anxiety, where trying to solve anxiety-based problems is likened to a game rigged against you, like a casino.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1MjMsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--c6571467e646d026b4c32c56e85a81234f27ab9c/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_8.jpg)
The video opens by illustrating the 'game' of anxiety, where trying to solve anxiety-based problems is likened to a game rigged against you, like a casino.
- Anxiety creates a situation where any action taken in response to it feels wrong, causing a perpetual loop of worry.
- Questions like 'Am I being boring?' or 'Am I being annoying?' stem from a fear of not being valued by others.
![The video opens by illustrating the 'game' of anxiety, where trying to solve anxiety-based problems is likened to a game rigged against you, like a casino.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1MjMsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--c6571467e646d026b4c32c56e85a81234f27ab9c/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_8.jpg)
Chapter 2
![The video emphasizes the importance of understanding the common root of seemingly opposite anxious thoughts and behaviors.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1MzMsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--5d492b93cab7a95b4831f336f9a17b4bd37ff0f0/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_33.jpg)
The video emphasizes the importance of understanding the common root of seemingly opposite anxious thoughts and behaviors.
- Anxiety-based thoughts like 'Am I being boring?' and 'Am I being annoying?' both come from the same underlying insecurity.
- The futility of trying to logically solve anxiety through behavior is highlighted, as it doesn't address the root emotional cause.
![The video emphasizes the importance of understanding the common root of seemingly opposite anxious thoughts and behaviors.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1MzMsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--5d492b93cab7a95b4831f336f9a17b4bd37ff0f0/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_33.jpg)
Chapter 3
![The video discusses the logical paradox in anxiety thought loops, where the mind presents unsolvable problems that fluctuate between extremes.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1MzksInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--bf0ee62d6189efd2a11278959f2ec7cd4520dc64/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_65.jpg)
The video discusses the logical paradox in anxiety thought loops, where the mind presents unsolvable problems that fluctuate between extremes.
- The mind produces conflicting thoughts that lead to opposite behaviors, both of which feel inadequate.
- Anxiety is not dependent on a single thought, but a pattern that emerges regardless of logical solutions.
![The video discusses the logical paradox in anxiety thought loops, where the mind presents unsolvable problems that fluctuate between extremes.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1MzksInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--bf0ee62d6189efd2a11278959f2ec7cd4520dc64/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_65.jpg)
Chapter 4
![The speaker suggests shifting focus from the content of anxious thoughts to the emotional roots that produce them.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NDUsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--76d21813600eb05f663882882825559b4e205404/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_102.jpg)
The speaker suggests shifting focus from the content of anxious thoughts to the emotional roots that produce them.
- The video advises recognizing the process by which the mind generates anxiety, and working on the emotional level instead of the intellectual level.
- Understanding the emotional drivers behind anxiety can help unravel the thoughts that are symptomatic of deeper insecurities.
![The speaker suggests shifting focus from the content of anxious thoughts to the emotional roots that produce them.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NDUsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--76d21813600eb05f663882882825559b4e205404/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_102.jpg)
Chapter 5
![The speaker explains how dealing with the emotional fuel behind anxious thoughts can lead to a more effective resolution.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NTEsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--ba51426a4713438f7ba95114eea966be0a0d7a78/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_153.jpg)
The speaker explains how dealing with the emotional fuel behind anxious thoughts can lead to a more effective resolution.
- By addressing feelings of inadequacy and fears of not being liked, one can begin to dismantle the thoughts that anxiety produces.
- Working with a therapist or coach can aid in exploring and resolving the underlying emotional issues.
![The speaker explains how dealing with the emotional fuel behind anxious thoughts can lead to a more effective resolution.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NTEsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--ba51426a4713438f7ba95114eea966be0a0d7a78/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_153.jpg)
Chapter 6
![The speaker highlights the ineffectiveness of trying to solve each anxious thought individually, as the root cause remains unaddressed.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NTksInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--ac55cc005f8e122161895f64b332aad6cbf576b8/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_202.jpg)
The speaker highlights the ineffectiveness of trying to solve each anxious thought individually, as the root cause remains unaddressed.
- Attempting to address each anxiety-provoking thought only perpetuates the cycle, rather than resolving the core issue.
- Identifying the root belief of not being socially valuable is key to stopping the loop of anxious thoughts.
![The speaker highlights the ineffectiveness of trying to solve each anxious thought individually, as the root cause remains unaddressed.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NTksInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--ac55cc005f8e122161895f64b332aad6cbf576b8/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_202.jpg)
Chapter 7
![The video suggests embracing and anticipating anxiety as a more effective approach than fighting it.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NjcsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--7c90597707a678ddc32f8e12bb0a954c0ef0093a/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_255.jpg)
The video suggests embracing and anticipating anxiety as a more effective approach than fighting it.
- Anticipating anxiety in social situations allows for a more prepared and accepting response, reducing the struggle against anxious thoughts.
- Acknowledging the presence of anxiety without resistance helps to dissipate its energy and break the cycle of thought loops.
![The video suggests embracing and anticipating anxiety as a more effective approach than fighting it.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NjcsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--7c90597707a678ddc32f8e12bb0a954c0ef0093a/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_255.jpg)
Chapter 8
![The speaker advises recognizing the distinction between one's anxiety and one's self, and not engaging in a battle with anxious thoughts.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NzEsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--1990de57d3fa5e66daaa81f1abdd17e168576fb9/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_328.jpg)
The speaker advises recognizing the distinction between one's anxiety and one's self, and not engaging in a battle with anxious thoughts.
- Understanding that anxious thoughts are a product of anxiety and not a reflection of self helps in reducing their impact.
- Rather than fighting anxiety, acknowledging and sitting with the underlying emotions can be more effective.
![The speaker advises recognizing the distinction between one's anxiety and one's self, and not engaging in a battle with anxious thoughts.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NzEsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--1990de57d3fa5e66daaa81f1abdd17e168576fb9/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_328.jpg)
Chapter 9
![The speaker emphasizes avoiding the trap of trying to intellectually solve anxiety, as it doesn't address the root emotional cause.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NzMsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--0cd3e7153ca095422f34655135ff700996193f66/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_395.jpg)
The speaker emphasizes avoiding the trap of trying to intellectually solve anxiety, as it doesn't address the root emotional cause.
- Intellectual solutions to anxiety are typically ineffective because they target symptoms rather than the underlying cause.
- Focusing on the emotional roots of insecurity and lack of confidence is the key to genuinely resolving anxiety.
![The speaker emphasizes avoiding the trap of trying to intellectually solve anxiety, as it doesn't address the root emotional cause.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NzMsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--0cd3e7153ca095422f34655135ff700996193f66/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_395.jpg)
Chapter 10
![The speaker outlines the importance of understanding the emotional fuel behind anxiety to truly overcome the anxious thought loops.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NzUsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--dfb01ba6005fef17d55732c7f22797537fdad1c1/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_499.jpg)
The speaker outlines the importance of understanding the emotional fuel behind anxiety to truly overcome the anxious thought loops.
- The video concludes by reiterating the concept of 'feeding the beast' and the necessity of dealing with the roots of anxiety rather than its intellectual manifestations.
- By working through feelings of inadequacy and fears, the power of anxiety can be diminished, and the thoughts it produces can crumble.
![The speaker outlines the importance of understanding the emotional fuel behind anxiety to truly overcome the anxious thought loops.](https://www.videogist.co/rails/active_storage/representations/redirect/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6Mzk1NzUsInB1ciI6ImJsb2JfaWQifX0=--dfb01ba6005fef17d55732c7f22797537fdad1c1/eyJfcmFpbHMiOnsiZGF0YSI6eyJmb3JtYXQiOiJqcGciLCJyZXNpemVfdG9fbGltaXQiOls3MjAsbnVsbF19LCJwdXIiOiJ2YXJpYXRpb24ifX0=--c9426325207613fdd890ee7713353fad711030c7/2469_499.jpg)
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